Uneven
by Diana the Moon Queen
Summary: Peek through Ragna's journal as he tries to get even with Hazama.
1. Chapter 1

This story is dedicated to LegnaResoleon for being my inspiration to start Fan Fictions.

**Uneven**

September 2, 2199

Hazama pulled an insanely sick prank on me today. I was just heading to the NOL branch, ready to rip his face off. Once I get there, everyone stares at my pants. I look down and there's this liquid flowing down them. Then they fall off! There's an awkward silence, and then those NOL jerks start laughing at me, pointing, and texting their friends about it. I'm surprised that texting still exists! Its so 187 years ago. Really, I did the math. I dash home with my pants in hand, once I get to my apartment, I inspect them. It seems like pee, but when I smell and feel it, it turns out I didn't crap my pants.

After microscopic observation, I figure out its oil, not pee. Did you really think I own a microscope? Of course not! It's identical to the red devil's blood. I notice that there's a clip thing attached to my pants with a not that says:

You just got trolololoooooollolololed!

Hazama

WTF?! I thought that he was busy with phenomena and all that crap. Rachel just suddenly busts herself out of thin air and says, "Oh really Ragna? I thought you were too old to have such incidents occur." I'm so gonna kill that bunny-leech! She's in my room now, watching a thousand ways to die. I'm surprised that exists too. I didn't know Rabbit watches TV. I'm writing this on the toilet right now. Okay, it's not what you think! I'm just in the bathroom so that godforsaken vampire doesn't read this journal. Whatever, I am gonna get even Hazama!

-_- Ragna the Bloodegde


	2. Chapter 2

September 3, 2199

This was the worst day ever! I thought that I would stop by the Kaka village to give Tao some food, and she nearly ate my hand. "Meow, sorry good guy!" she said to me. Suuuuure, like she even knows what the word 'sorry' means. "Hey, you know those bombs that you got in here? Can I borrow one?" I ask her. "Yeah good guy! Neow let me go find one! BRB!" she skipped off to a seemingly abandoned hut. Wait, she uses text talk? What the hell? Doesn't BRB mean busy rescuing batman? More importantly, Batman still exists?! What's up with these people? Screw what I just wrote, we're moving on! So she comes back with a gigantic bomb with a few kittens climbing all over it. "Here good guy! This is a bomb that I got from the green guy, take good care of it, and meow!" she says. I didn't know who the hell this 'green guy' was, but I didn't care.

That bomb weighed craptons more than I expected. I was impressed that Tao could carry it. It felt as though I was carrying a ball full of pie filling, but it still weighed craptons. "Wait up, Brother!" Damn it! I knew that voice anywhere! "Oh Brother, why are you carrying such an explosive? Let me help!" Jin starts to lick my ankle. I knew he liked me, but that is creepy beyond hell. "Jin, get the hell off me!" I say. "If you won't let me help you, then I won't. Before that…" then the bastard lights the bomb! Before I can let go of it, it explodes in my face. Then it turns out, **it was pie filling!** There's another note that says:

I'm the green guy!

Hazama

P.S. TROLLOLOLOLOOOOOOOOOLED BY A BOSS!

So now, my godforsaken journal is covered in cream. Oh yeah, thanks Hazama! You're asking to get your soul ripped apart! D:


	3. Chapter 3

Hey you guys! I managed to steal Ragna's Journal again! *insert evil laugh here*

September 4, 2199

Okay, Hazama has gone way too far. I was just in a restaurant minding my own business, when he pops out of nowhere to bother me. First, he starts poking me, saying the word 'bother' over and over again. I'm just sitting there like, 'Oh my god! What do you want?' Then, he starts saying crap about DNA samples. I didn't get a word he said. Then he turns around, and there's a chick version of me! She suddenly throws me to the ground, and then traps me in a lock. I'm just like, 'Sorry lady, but I have to kill you now, k? K.' She's actually pretty tough. I have to go, cuz she's letting me write this while I'm pinned to the ground. Although she did just try to kill me she's actually pre


	4. Chapter 4

Just to clarify, the "pre" in the last chapter was like that because he didn't have time to finish writing the word. That girl version of him probably had a time limit for him or something. So, now on to the next entry! By the way, I let my little sister write this. Thanks Luci!

September 5, 2199

Hey! I'm Ragna the Bloodegde! I like to wet my pants in front of the NOL! My pants always smell like poop! I like to wear a red jacket wherever I go and be like #yolosawg! I always carry this oversized fork too, and I'm just like tough little man, bruh. I like little girls to. I always hang around em like all da girls in da house luv meh! I be like yo bro Imma pay mah lil bro to kick yo ass! K Imma crap my pants more now k? K.

-Hazama


End file.
